My First Binge Begins...Part 2

 In the blink of an eye, I looked at the empty bag of Doritos chips in my hand and thought, 

“Eh? I finished it already?”

Without much thought, I crumpled the bag and threw it in the trash can.

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I got hungry within a few minutes, so I made myself some spicy instant ramen noodles 

and finished with half a bowl of white rice. 

Soon after, I brushed my teeth as it was time for bed and went to sleep.

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During my high school years, I didn't eat anything all day at school.

I didn't have any friends to sit and eat with, 

and I feared what might happen to me sitting alone in the cafeteria, 

which was loud and full of unstable high school energy.

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I didn't realize I was hungry when I was in classes, but when I got home from school, 

I would feel a sudden rush of hunger as the tension would dissipate.

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Since I came home starving after school every day, 

my grandmother always prepared dishes for me to eat when I got home.

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After gorging myself on her homemade soybean paste soup and bulgogi, 

I sat down on the living room couch and watched the TV. 

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Then, I picked up the box of store-bought glazed donuts on the coffee table and ate two, 

enjoying the sweet taste on my tongue.

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Living such an isolated and simple repetitive life of home-school, school-home, 

food that I hadn't paid much attention to in Korea 

brought me a small amount of happiness at the time.

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After a few weeks, my aunt, who lived near my grandmother's house, 

recommended that I start going to a nearby Korean church.

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Since I was missing close relationships with friends my age 

who shared the same culture as me, 

I realized how valuable it was to be able to meet and interact with them at church.

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I got to know the high school students at the church and 

spent the day at church on Saturdays, too. 

One day, a female youth pastor from the church grabbed me by the arm 

to take me to the cafeteria for snacks that she brought.

When we got there, she said to me.

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“I thought you were slim, but you have some fat on your arms?”

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That one sentence struck me like a bolt of lightning.

BOOM!!!.............